Monday, November 28, 2011
Oh boy - someone please save me. My 20 yr old daughter is trying to be an adult. Of course, she doesn't see she is going about it completely wrong. Today she has the day off. She said last week that she needs to get to her college to get herself registered. So obviously, she's at the college today. NOPE! She's having fun hanging out with a friend.
She still does not remember to do her chores around the house, but she's beginning to curse around me. I'm not sure why she thinks this is ok. I'm not even sure why I'm putting up with this mess. It's probably my own fears of us having the same messed up relationship that my mother and I have now. We only have animosity and no real bond. I'm afraid I'll damage my relationship with her somehow.
My daughter has no idea how life really works, she's so used to having me bail her out of things. How do you stop being a parent to a child and start being a parent to an almost adult that won't listen? HHHmmmm, maybe I need to call Dr. Phil. Where's the Oprah Show when I need some advice?
Maybe the thing I need to do it lay out the rules, and expect her to follow them. After all, as with any adult, if you don't follow the rules you always have the option to get your own place and make your own rules. She just doesn't get it. It's weird for me because she reminds me of my sister, N. She's just three years younger than me and she still doesn't get it (life) either. I really don't think life is that difficult to understand.
You have rules you have to follow from other people and entities no matter where or who you are. You cannot expect to be the rule maker unless you really hold a position of power. You follow the rules to get to where you want to be. Obviously, along the way you'll find some rules are easier to break or bend than others. Hey, maybe I need to find a Life Rule book for her. Or better still, write my own and sign a different name to it. Then she'll be sure to read it.
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